Let me give you a little history. Growing up with seven siblings, both of my parents, and my uncle too (for a few years), I learned to trust. Whether it was my brother and I rough housing, or my dad pitching a baseball to me, I trusted that they knew the extent of my abilities. I trusted my brother to respect my abilities and not get to carried away, and I had faith that my dad knew just how to stretch my abilities the right way to help me become better. I also climbed a lot of things when I was younger. I climbed trees, sometimes I'd climb onto our second story roof, I climbed whatever looked like it'd be fun to climb. Not only did I develop a trust in myself and my abilities in this area of my life, but I also trusted thin branches, slippery shingles, and loose rocks. I was always trusting something.
You can imagine, when I got to middle school, I was the same, mostly innocent, trusting child as I had been before. But after enough of these games, I grew tired of people "crying wolf" and making things up and saying things that weren't true. I wanted to believe my friends, but I knew what they were saying wasn't true. I stopped trusting them on that level. I still trusted them when it came to confiding secrets and the like, but that was usually a mistake too. It took me a while to realize that that was how most kids were at that point in their maturing nature.
But I stopped trusting. By the time I was a young teenager, I began to doubt my father's love for me. I began to doubt my mother's love. I doubted that my friends were really my friends. I was just a kid. I felt like I'd been duped in a lot of ways, I felt like dirt; I didn't believe that any human being seriously wanted anything to do with me. It reached the point where I doubted that God had any plan for me. Just like in those games, if God would've had me do one thing, I would do the opposite. If my mom or dad asked something of me, I might deliberately ignore them and do what I wanted.
It took me a long time to learn to trust again. It wasn't until my relationships with my parents and siblings began to heal that I would trust them again. But it developed and grew over time. Even beginning to trust God, however, was a totally different world. I began to live out my Christian walk and follow Him as best as I thought I could, but I only said that I trusted Him. That was a good first step to take at the time, but I had no understanding of what it meant to truly trust God. I needed a reason to trust God. That seemed completely reasonable. If I were going to trust my friend with something important, whether it was a secret, or a special possession, I would need good proof that they weren't going to fail me. I would need obvious proof that they were trustworthy. That's completely logical, isn't it?
We can't put God in the same box as we would our friends. We can't make Him our "pocket-sized Jesus." We can try to do that, but when we try to live with His authority, we're only going to have the same pocket-sized authority. If we are going to have authority over all things, whether of darkness or of light, we need the full-sized Jesus. There's so much trash and filth and evil in the world and around us in our own houses and our own lives; we can't make it with anything less than everything.
Trusting God means having faith in Him without having a reason, without having proof. Once you have a good reason, it's no longer trust, it's justifiable expectations. "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." Don't we have reason enough to trust Him without being given a sign or a personal revelation? Let me draw a picture for you. Imagine this:
You see yourself standing. It's only you, standing there. You are alone in the dark. Suddenly, a bright light appears in front of you; not frighteningly bright, but this light is directly in front of you, close enough to touch you. Slowly, this light takes the form of a man. The form grows and the light dims slightly so that you can see the details of this man, this large powerfully built man. He arms are brawny and the muscles seem chiseled from stone. His neck is as thick as a small tree and his thin white undershirt is filled with a barrel chest. Yet, as this man looks into your eyes, you see deep compassion and boundless love. He reaches to grasp your hand and you feel that despite his muscular appearance, his hands are strangely delicate yet strong at the same time. This man is God. As you look at this man, he turns and faces away from you. He stands straight and still. At this time, another light begins to appear. This light also begins to take the form of a man. This man is less powerfully built, but he is wearing full battle gear, from his steel helm, which is open so that you can see his face, to the drawn sword in his right hand, to the steel plate boots covering his feet. This man materializes at your side. You notice that though he is dressed as a warrior, he bears the markings of a medic upon his breastplate. This man turns to look at you and lays a firm yet gentle hand on your shoulder. He looks into your eyes and smiles at what he sees there. This man is Jesus. He turns to face forward, looking in the same direction as you, towards God's back. God begins to walk forward, you and Jesus begin to follow. As you walk, small lights begin to emerge from the darkness around you. There are countless lights, possibly hundreds. They begin to come closer until they're all almost connected, completely surrounding you. These lights do not dim but you can only see the ghostly outline of their bodies. They are garbed similarly to Jesus but they have great wings and their swords are on fire. This is the heavenly host that surrounds you. You continue to walk. You are dumbfounded by what you see. It amazes you, but what does it all mean?
God walks in front of us to protect us from the brunt of the force:
"The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes." -Deuteronomy 1:30
Christ walks beside us to aid us in what God allows through:
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." -Hebrews 13:5
God has commanded His angels to keep watch all around you:
"For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone." -Psalm 91:11-12
"The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them." -Psalm 34:7
What you see here is a demonstration of God's promise to us. He will always be there in front of you, Jesus will always be with you, and the angels will keep watch over you. On top of all that, He promises you still more:
"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life." -Psalm 23:6
So, not only do you have God before you, Jesus next to you, and the host of heaven around you, but two new lights appear on your flanks. These lights take the form of two men, dressed in black suits, and wearing dark, shaded glasses and subtle earpieces. Goodness and Mercy, like two slick agents, track you everywhere you go. They trail you along the mountain's path and through the valley's thick underbrush.
There can be no doubt that God is looking out for you. Any and every situation you face, great or small, has submitted it's application to God. God has run thorough background checks on every single conflict and has only let through the issues which He knows that you are capable of defeating. Some of them may be too big for you to face alone. In those instances, you must step to the side, allowing Jesus full access to the problem. You may have a particular plan to defeat certain conflicts; maybe your ways work. How much better will things work out if you allow Jesus to fight for you? You won't know until you try.
If you don't understand any of this, I want you to remember three nothings. Nothing you deal with is unknown to God. Nothing you deal with has slipped past God without His consent. And nothing you deal with must be fought alone.
Here's one final example. Picture a small family. There's a father, mother, and two children. The younger child is a beautiful baby girl, only 3 months old. The father loves both children, but that tiny baby girl is so precious to him that he begins to cry every time he thinks about her. He had felt the same way about his son, now seven years old, when he was her age. His love for his son hadn't dwindled, it had grown and developed. He still would spend time pitching to his son in the backyard every evening when he got home from work, no matter how much studying he needed to do. He was his superhero sidekick, his partner in crime when it came to raiding Mommy's cookie jar, his wrestling buddy before bedtime prayers, his tiny prince. One night, after the father had put all the kids to bed and had gone to bed himself, a thief broke into the house. He had come in search of money, but he couldn't find more than a few nickels on the kitchen counter top. So he snuck into the master bedroom where the father and mother were sleeping. He glanced swiftly around but still found nothing. He was determined to not leave empty handed. Then he saw her. The moonlight fell through the blinds of the windows like golden columns, alighting on her crib. Quietly, the thief crept to the side of the crib and bent to pick her up. Surely, her parents would be willing to pay a decent ransom to get their child back safely. Just as he began to scoop her up, a door in the hall opened up and a soft whimper came floating to his ears. Small footsteps began to come near the parents' doorway. He released the peacefully slumbering baby and carefully drifted into the open doorway. The child in front of him gasped as he reached down to cover his nose and mouth. The muffled noises weren't enough to wake the tired father. At the bottom of the stairway leading to the front door, the child caused the thief to slip on a stair. As they stumbled, the child was able to release one choking yell. It was just enough to startle the father from his sleep. He jumped up and raised towards his seven year old's bedroom. As he got to the room he heard a door slam. He didn't see his son anywhere so he raced downstairs, flipping on light switches as he yelled in fear and anger. He flung open the door and bounded off the front porch just in time to see the taillights of a small car pulling away from the curb. As fast as he ran, the car disappeared before he was anywhere close. His son was gone. Police later found the child's remains in an abandoned housing unit. The family mourned for days. For weeks they cried together, praying that somehow God reverse the time so that they could relive that night and prevent what had befallen their household. They knew there was no way that would ever happen and over time, the family began to pull themselves up again, leaning heavily on one another. One night, about three weeks after the crime, the father was by his window. It was late in the night and he was praying and weeping. He begged God to forgive him for failing as a father. As he stood up, tears still streaming from his sleep deprived eyes, his gaze fell upon the sleeping beauty beside him. She lay there, so oblivious to everything, yet such a huge part of it all. He reached out to hold her hand. Her lips quivered in the light of the moon as he touched her. That night, he vowed to give the girl the very best of everything she could ever have. Nothing would ever keep him from loving her. For she was not only living her life from this point on. She was living because her brother had been taken instead. As their father, he would make sure that his son's death would not be wasted. That baby girl had a huge future. He knew that God agreed.
You too are a child of God. God's son died for you. You were going to be killed, but instead, he was taken in your place. You were found guilty, but were given life. How much greater is God's love for you now that your life has been intertwined with his son's? If His children allow their lives to be wasted, does that not then make the death of His son in vain? You have been called to a higher standard. Your life was preserved not so that you could continue to live in fear, doubt, regret, worry, and sin. You are to live with boldness, with trust. You know God has bigger plans for you. You know God wouldn't forsake you ever because He wouldn't have you lose yourself again. He is looking after you just as closely as He has always been. You have only to trust Him.
Just Trust.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
Lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways submit to him,
He will make your paths straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6
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